Yet again at (Not-so) Honest Gary’s Used Car Emporium, Gary showed me this 1988 (guesstimate) Saab 900 Saloon. As usual, he tried to sell it but failed. But he thought (as usual) that somebody might like it. I liked it, but not enough to buy it, because it had no service history (sob). Sadly, both of us knew that there were many reasons to like this car. First, it was a 4-door sedan, which is usually harder to find than the 3 and 5 door counterparts.
Second, this car had a 5-speed stick and a relatively clean interior. “Who knows what it has been through” Gary said. I said “Yeah” in response.
Third, this car should have the lusty Saab B-series OHC Slant 4 without the unreliable turbo! Man, I really want this car now, but still not enough to buy it.
Shortly after sobbing about the Saab, two jobless yuppies came up to Gary and said “How much for the Scaab?” Gary whispered into my ear “Hey! Do you want to see me sucker some yuppies into a sale?” My response was “Yeah! When does it start?” Gary said “Now, and sit by the Oldsmobiles.” Watching the (not-so) hard sale was like watching an episode of Candid Camera. It was almost surreal.
When the Yuppies filled out all the forms, they gave Gary the down payment, and drove off in a cloud of blue smoke like it’s ancestors would. Happy trails, dumb customers. Happy trails to you.