About a year ago, I, in a cold medication-induced stupor, suffered from a bout of insomnia. Therefore, in the wee small hours of an ice-cold morning, I explored the internet in my typical haphazard fashion, before stumbling upon a Chrysler Master Technician video starring “Tech,” who proceeded to explain the fundamentals of the Carter AFB to actual human technicians. It was the second time in my life that I wondered if I had fallen fast asleep into the clutches of a lucid dream. I hadn’t.
The first time I suffered from that strange sensation, I was watching the video for Trace Adkins’ “Honky Tonk Badonkadonk,” and my initial thought then was that there is no way a record company would actually release a song that ludicrous. Of course, I had overestimated the taste of the American public again, and it was a huge hit. Shows how smart I am. Tech, too, turned out to be a real thing, and I discovered that Tech was not only trippy in the way that only Chrysler Corporation can be, but he was also helpful and philosophically stimulating.
In this 1965 video, Tech explains the concepts of electricity, a common theme in Chrysler’s “Master Technician Series” of pamphlets and filmstrips, which were apparently distributed once a month to an assuredly eager staff of technicians. After watching a few (or a few dozen) of these videos, I began to wonder if Tech didn’t exist in a utopia of sorts, the perfect workplace.
After all, Tech is a eight-inch or so tall doll with a gruff voice and a receding hairline. In most workplaces, Tech would not be taken seriously as a knowledgeable mechanic. In these service videos, however, the other technicians and engineers treat Tech like an absolute equal, avoiding workplace hazing or pratfalls of any kind. Tech would fit into the glovebox of almost any Chrysler product, yet there is no evidence that any technician shoved him in there like some Neanderthal high school jokester might.
That kind of collaboration seems to be rare in the world in which we occupy, and I can unfortunately imagine actual Chrysler techs being forced to watch these quite informative videos each month and deriding poor Tech. Fortunately for us, there is a video archive of a perfect place beyond the unrighteous tee-heeing of those less enlightened. The Imperial Club has been gracious enough to upload all the tech materials an insomniac could ever desire, and here is the website: http://www.imperialclub.com/Repair/Lit/Films/.
Until next time, be nice to your plastic coworkers.