The Inn at the 5th is Eugene’s new upscale downtown hotel. Unfortunately, the architecture is very … umm … uninspired. As is their tag line: “A Very Special Boutique Hotel” (gag). Your trip to and from the airport will be in either a black Mercedes Sprinter van or the more expensive (but hardly new) S-Class sedan conspicuously parked by the front door. There’s a day spa in the ground floor to attend to all your bad-hair or bad-skin issues.
But all is not lost; since the Inn desperately needs every marketing ploy possible to attract folks to pay at least $149 a night in downtown Eugene during the depths of our gray winter, I’ve franchised them to offer official Curbside Classic tours. And we’ve found just the car to do it in, a 1967 Volvo 122S “Amazon”. Tours, guided by your choice of attractive (and personally trained and certified) young female or male guide, come in one, two, four, and 24 hour lengths, and start at $99. I’m scouring craigslist for a suitable old Brougham with velour upholstery as an alternative tour vehicle for the import-hating crowd. Got any suggestions?
Alternative vehicle? GM B-body – bonus points for rarer ones like Pontiac Catilina, Bonneville, Parisienne, Chevy Impala, Buick Lesabre… (all post 1977 of course) or maybe a C-body post 1977 Park Avenue or Electra.
You’d have to pull the engine first, Dan, and put a 454 in.
“The architecture is very uninspired”. Wow, Paul – so, um, POLITE! As an architect, I was also drawn to the building, but I came up with a different set of words.
I’ll be quiet now.
I was wondering if it was a brand new buidling or if they took an older L-shaped Holiday Inn and then threw a whole bunch of gingerbread at it.
Hey its got balconies for the rooms, thats kinda cool.
You’re close. It was a two or three-story retail building (Nike Store), and they added floors as well as the extension to the front. The really silly part is that the original building (built in the 80s) had some brick accents (which looked stupid even at the time). Unbelievably, they not only kept the brick accents, but extended them up and into the new addition in the front. They managed to find bricks that matched, obviously. But as is also apparent, they didn’t do that to the wing on the right….a real mish-mash that looks very out of date. They didn’t ask me….
Come on. Eugene? Really I think this is some German hotel w/ a US flag stuck in front for some reason. NATO meeting?
Is this another one of your ‘story’ sightings? A la your Father’s car washing?
This is bunker architecture at it’s worse.
Sure it’s Eugene. The Volvo has vintage Oregon plates, and I don’t think there are many Chevy Equinoxes in Europe.
That’s exactly what I was thinking, an older Holiday Inn. There’s a couple still around near Pittsburgh.
Were they “Crass Developer Depreciable Expedient – Late Phase” by chance?
I would recommend a 1977-1980 Fleetwood Brougham or a Fleetwood Limo. Though a 1961-1967 convertible Lincoln sedan does provide great sight seeing, maybe a 1968-1972 Vista Cruiser/Sport Wagon with the skylights?
How about this one?
https://www.curbsideclassic.com/curbside-classics-american/curbside-classic-1975-imperial-lebaron-coupe-the-last-one-worthy-of-its-name/
It’s already in Eugene, it’s white so it matches the Amazon, and no doubt both JPC and ’73ImpCapn will be keen to go for a ride if they’re ever in town.
There’s a nice black Amazon that’s been parked on the street just down from where I live. It looks nice and clean, far too nice to be sleeping outside through a Calgary winter…
Whats on the top floor with the big balcony?
The Armada Room?
The most expensive suites: Cadillac Room, Imperial Room….They all come with a telescope, for spotting curbside classics around downtown.
Will there be a Spanish themed piano bar called “The Matador”?
“Not the Armada Room!”
Call Mr. Ronzini, we need our old gig back.
I’d say a 1957 Lincoln convertible with the diagonal headlights and glass reverse angle rear window.
Convertible weather is a good six months away yet… 🙁
Whatever it is, the car should have a formal roof, for maximum privacy. The Inn at the 5th is a name for a place that offers hourly rates and no questions asked, in case the patrons are called upon to testify against themselves.
Your only choice is the 1978 Royal Deluxe II. “It rides smooth because we build it right.”
“Inn at Fifth?” How About the Mark Cross Fifth Avenue? Now that sounds like a swanky hotel. All courtesy cars would, of course, be black Fifth Avenues. Just be sure to replace those pesky Ultramatics with something reliable.
Well they could go with the old RWD 5th Avenue. Though the 5th Ave is a good idea considering the hotel name.
There is a bar across from the Mass. State House called the 21st Amendment, the one that repealed Prohibition. I think something similar is at work with this fine lodging establishment.
Lipstick on your collar?
TV off the balcony?
College fund cleaned out with checks made out to “cash”?
Take the Fifth! (c)
I’m with Tom on the 1990-92 Chrysler New Yorker Fifth Avenue. And a black Mark Cross Edition would sound just right. Actually, a 1990 Fifth Avenue was my Dad’s last car . Very nice, comfortable and more spacious in the back seat than anything today. Was a great highway cruiser too, when I drove it down to Charlotte Motor Speedway for a car show and swap meet.
Just to clarify, I meant they should rename the hotel the “Mark Cross Fifth Avenue.” The cars, of course, would have to be Chryslers.
I’m thinking Paul ran up the American flag at dawn when nobody was looking just in order to write this spoof.
The hotel is very reminiscent of Italian alpine hotels that I remember from the sixties.
Spot on Norm. It does. Perhaps Paul a mid sixties Merc 220D. Ex taxi of course.
When I look at this building, I picture a stereotypical gay man walking up to it, placing one hand on his hip and exclaiming “Now that’s a La Quinta with PIZAZZ!” while holding his other hand over his head and snapping his fingers.
This looks like a job for Eric the ScoutDude’s 6 door Travelall, as soon as he gets it finished. This attraction will be so popular that you will need the extra capacity. Plus, visibility is really good.
Plan B would be a Stude Wagonaire – in decent weather, you could open the roof and let everyone stand up in back, hanging onto the grab-bars that will be bolted into the roof-edges.
To go with this architecture, I think what is needed is a Toyota 4-runner stretch limo.
Now its time to spend and evening with…..The Continental…..
Cham Pag Na!