Come on down to Rusty Trusty Motors, where we have plenty of good, solid transportation and popcorn for the kids. We’ve got cars for every price point and pocketbook down here at Rusty’s, and we’re even open late on Thursdays to serve the hard working American who deserves a good deal.
Just look at this 23-year-old Mercury Topaz LTS. It’s almost rust free, so your kids will have almost no chance of contracting tetanus when exiting the vehicle. Our award winning body shop has even cleaned up that back bumper a bit just to show we care. You’ll never get a bum steer at Rusty’s! We’ll even throw in an oil top off, no charge, if you buy today!
In trouble with the man? Well, John Q. Law need not know that you’re a moneybags with the upscale Mercury version of this classic automobile. It comes equipped with this off-color Tempo trunklid that lets Smokey know you’re one of us, not some high-roller who won’t drive a basic Ford. Rusty has your best interest in mind, so come on down to see one of our friendly salespeople.
Don’t let the outside fool you, folks. This sumptuous interior invites: you and four of your closest friends or family members can ride in elegant style. They don’t make ’em like this anymore; in 1991, engineers designed safety into a vehicle. It wasn’t just tacked on, like the thousand side curtain air bags on those new jobs out front. Safety comes naturally with motorized seatbelts that have no resemblance whatsoever to a guillotine.
Enjoy near Cadillac luxury, with power windows, an aftermarket CD player, and a three-speed automatic. Unlike newer premium cars that jolt their passengers with up to eight gearchanges, this Topaz will never upshift more than twice. That’s solid engineering from the days when automakers knew how to coddle a passenger. Additionally, this Topaz comes standard with optional air conditioning.*
*if you get it repaired after you buy the car
This well-maintained Topaz has plenty of life left in it–with a low, low 113,000 (or 213,000) miles, dozens of trouble-free miles await the happy new owner. Unlike many brand new base model compacts, this Topaz has the desirable cruise control option, so you can eat and drive without having to worry about maintaining your speed on the freeway! See that emblem on the wheel? That symbolizes reassurance, reassurance that only Mercury could design a car where the quality’s built in.
That quality extends to the motor, too. Most of America will never experience the joy of observing the Topaz’s sleekly styled front end, because this LTS is powered by an “HSO” 2.3 liter four-cylinder. “HSO” stands for “Higher-Specific Output.” Hold on to the kids, because this Topaz is pumping out two more horsepower than the base model, for an even hundred. Feel like John Wayne today! Heck, feel stronger and more virile, because the Duke usually rode on one horse, while you can sit behind 100! God bless America!
So come on down to Rusty Trusty motors, where you can have a slice of Americana and a piece of like-new American history for the totally logical price of $1497 plus tax, title, and licensing fees. We take clean trades, so push, pull, or drag your old clunker in to Rusty’s, and let us set you up with a transportation special you can be proud of.