(The pictures in this post are borrowed from Google image search.)
This COAL is dedicated to my Mom who was there for me through this ordeal.
It was the Spring of 1998, my Grad School career had abruptly ended a year earlier. I found a job working for a small company for not much more than minimum wage. Money was tight and my automotive luck had run out. My 1986 Pontiac Grand Am had just suffered transmission failure. The loaner Chrysler LeBaron from my Dad’s fleet was severely damaged in a hit and run. My Mom was generous enough to lend me her 1987 Chrysler New Yorker Turbo. Unfortunately, the New Yorker was totaled in a one car accident a week after she had loaned it to me. I was utterly humiliated!
I thought I had hit the lowest point possible. I had no more than $400, zero mechanical skills, and needed a car for work. With the world wide web relatively new, I relied on Auto Trader to help me find my next vehicle. Due to my limited funds I had three options:
Option 1: Two 1981 Ford Thunderbirds. Neither vehicle was running but the seller guaranteed that I could make one operable vehicle out of the two hulks.
Option 2: 1980 Dodge St. Regis. I so wanted this car. It was brown and seemed relatively straight. However, the owner assured me that although it ran and drove it would never pass Maryland State Inspection in part because it had no exhaust system and for other reasons that he did not really want to get into.
Option 3: 1983 Saab 900 sedan. Ran and drove with 180,000 miles dealer serviced. I called the seller who told me that it was her daughter’s daily driver. While she could not guarantee that the car would pass inspection, there was no reason for it not to since it was driven daily by her daughter.
I really wanted the St. Regis but needed something that would pass inspection because I needed a car for work. The two Thunderbirds sounded intriguing but I had zero mechanical skills, space, or money to tackle such a project. At the time, it seemed like the Saab was the logical choice so I called the seller to make the appointment.
I showed up there with my girlfriend (who would eventually become my wife) expecting an ugly rusted eyesore of a car but was very pleasantly surprised. As far as I know, the above is not a picture of the actual car but it looked identical to this picture I took from the Internet. The fact that we lived in Maryland and the pictured car has D.C. plates makes me wonder if it’s the same car.
The car was a base non turbo model with the 2 liter four cylinder model with 116 HP. The only “luxury” features on the car were air conditioning, automatic transmission, cruise control – which I never used – and an aftermarket tape deck which funnily enough, was the same unit that came with my ’76 Camaro. Small world, I guess.
I immediately fell in love with its styling and European flavor after having only owned American cars. I liked the full set of gauges and especially liked the novelty of the ignition key in the center console which was a Saab hallmark at the time. The AC blew ice cold, the car started right up and sounded strong, there was a new oil change sticker, and there were no dents and very, very little rust. The interior was spotless except for a slightly sagging headliner. To top it off, I loved the folding rear seat, something none of my previous sedans had before. Little did I know how handy it would come in later.
The seller gave us the keys and told us to drive for as long as we wanted to, so the two of us got in the car and drove it for a good hour. The car accelerated well with no strange sounds. It was the first car I had driven with four wheel disc brakes so I was amazed at its stopping ability. Everything was great until the very end of the test drive when we heard a hissing noise. At first I thought flat tire or other mechanical failure until I looked at my girlfriend who seemed so much shorter all of a sudden. Apparently, her seat bottom had broken and she was now practically sitting on the floor! No problem I said, we’ll just get some throw pillows to boost the seat back up. If this was the only problem with this “exotic” car, to me, it was still a bargain.
So we want back to the seller who unexpectedly took $50 off the price of the car with one proviso: once we took possession of the title, we were to take the car, and never ever contact her again. This made us a little suspicious but aside from the seat, there didn’t seem to be anything wrong with the car so we gave her the money and I took ownership of my first and to this day only European car.
Things were great for the first two weeks or so. We took the car on all our adventures, including trips to the beach. Trouble started when the passenger side door lock mechanism failed. You could lock the door but could not unlock it using the key. You had to manually unlock it from the inside. No problem, I still had one working door lock. Two days later I ate my words. Outside the grocery store, I filled my trunk with groceries and returned the shopping cart. I unlocked the driver’s door with my key like always and pulled on the door handle which promptly came off in my hands. The passenger side door was locked so I was effectively locked out of the car.
I had no choice but to empty the groceries from the trunk onto the ground, crawl into the trunk and force the rear seat down in order to gain access to the interior. All this while my fellow shoppers looked on with amusement. It’s a wonder that no one called the police! Until the broken door handle was eventually fixed, I had to open the door from the passenger’s side and I could never lock the car again. Driving home from the grocery store, the end of the turn signal stalk broke and was hanging by a wire…I ended up taping it back on.
And the fun continued…. the car left me stranded twice in two weeks, once in a rain storm, the other in the dead of night on the side of the road due to electrical gremlins. By this time the Inspection deadline had passed. I knew it was not going to pass inspection but I had to get to work so I drove it anyway until the Maryland State Police also noticed that my inspection date was up…they said inspect it or else! I went to my bosses and told them the problem. They said to leave the car with them for the weekend. When I got the car back on Monday, it had a genuine, legal inspection certificate. I didn’t ask.
For the next month or so, the car was OK besides the fact that I couldn’t lock the doors (my bosses fixed the outside door handle that came off but the door lock was now broken). At this point the headliner began to disintegrate so whenever you exited the car you had what seemed like stardust flakes in your hair that you had to brush off. After this, the automatic transmission began to misbehave. In order to get sufficient power from the engine, you had to shift manually from 1 to 2 to 3.
By the way, the engine was actually very good. When it shifted properly, it was smooth and powerful and the car handled very well: it was the first car I had driven that could get me to triple digit speeds without feeling like I was at the edge of control. In addition, the AC blew ice cold all the time. Anyway, I did not mind the transmission so much…I just pretended I had a stick shift!
The car then began leaking coolant from the recovery bottle. At this point I had neither the money to get a new one from Saab nor have it installed so I went to a junkyard and found one from there and did my first ever DIY auto repair job…still proud of that to this day. The ultimate disaster struck maybe a month later when it refused to start. In the glove box, I found an old receipt from the dealer in the town where I bought the car. I called them to seek their advice. They knew the car immediately!
They said that the car was a total lemon and they had told the previous owner that it was no longer worth their while to work on it and it was good for parts only…they were appalled and distressed that the car was still on the road! They urged me to junk it immediately! Over the phone, they diagnosed the problem to be the starter; banging on it hard enough would make the car start. After they helped me with that, as with the previous owner they told me never to contact them again because there was nothing more they could do and did not want to feel responsible for what would happen if I continued to operate the car. Great!
The banging on the starter trick worked for a while but inevitably, the time came when it no longer started no matter how hard I banged on it. I checked with a local repair shop and it was $600 installed with a used starter! I was utterly dejected since I did not have the funds. My girlfriend and I shared her parents’ reliable Mazda for a while until the need for two cars forced me to reluctantly make an SOS to Mom and Dad.
After the starter was fixed the car was actually pretty reliable and I took it on a few relatively long trips. However, I didn’t quite trust it after all it put us through and I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop. At this time, my girlfriend was ready to buy her first brand new car, and we had gotten engaged a few months earlier so we used the Saab as her trade in.
One good thing that came out of this fiasco is that Mom and I bonded over it. She was encouraging and willing to listen to my Saab stories that I emailed her regularly to talk about what was happening with the Saab. She still has those e-mails to this day. In a sense, she was my first COAL reader.
At the time, because of my youth and extremely limited budget, I categorized this episode as my worst automotive decision ever. In retrospect, it really wasn’t that bad. The car had nearly 200,000 miles on it – not bad for an 80’s car – plus the entire experience cost me at most 1,500 bucks including the price of the car. Nearly ten years later, I would spend eight times that with nothing to show for it in what amounts to the worst auto decision I ever made. But that’s a story for later on in this series.
My next COAL marks my return to my more traditional automotive choices.
Nice write-up, Fred!
Ha – Love the wordplay there – Saab Story = Sob Story 😉 I hope it was intentional! Great write-up, cheers!
40 years ago a SAAB dealer in Indiana had a billboard on I-80 just east of Gary with “Stop in and hear our SAAB story….
Those were and are terrible cars; an exercise in how much automotive abuse you can stand….college roommate’s family had a ’66 two stroke triple wagon. It was interesting watching him pour in a pint of two stroke oil and then start manhandling the whole car to get it mixed in the gas tank. But it got us around. His family was into weird cars; his brother had a Citroen Mehari. He was up from Key West and we’re riding along I-94 in January….
The two-stroke Saabs were a unique car and certainly non perfect, but If your friend was pouring 2 stroke oil in AFTER gassing it up, then he was at least part of the problem, not all the car.
The Saab 900-related cars were made for 25 or so years and sold all over the world–they were great cars. The story is about a clapped-out car that had reached the end of its life when the author got it. Considering that he had $400 to spend and not a bit of mechanical know-how, I would say that this car did him quite well.
Good story. Unfortunately, it reminds me a bit of my Honda, though in it’s defense it has WAAAAY more than 180,000 miles on it.
Your “problems” with automatic transmissions is why I try to avoid them when possible….even though I’ve never had 1 “fail”.
Finally, it almost sounds like your bosses were somehow shady, but being familiar with Pennsylvania’s state inspection system it doesn’t surprise me they got your car inspected when you thought it wasn’t possible.
I’ve had 3 auto trannys die on me, only 1 manual and 3 clutch replacements. I don’t like autos, they seem to be a wear item.
Nice looking car!
But honestly, Fred, don’t all Saabs come with a story?
At least the A/C was reliable! 😉
In the late 90s I too owned an 83 Saab 900 beater that I bought for $600. It was a great car until I lent it out and it was returned with a destroyed manual tranny. The cost would have been way too high to repair. It was actually one of my all-time favorite cars.
I love these weekend COAL posts! I was a bit dismayed when David Saunders ran out of cars to write about, but with Ben on Saturdays and Fred on Sundays, my cup runneth over with tales of old beaters. I nearly went for a red SAAB of similar vintage a few years ago, but the test drive revealed some “issues” with the automatic transmission… A car that needs a new slushbox is no bargain, and I let that one get away.
Wait until I start with mine. I’ve owned 19 cars, had 9 others either given to me or were considered ‘mine’ in the family’s fleet and 8 motorcycles.
Definitely something to look forward to!
Love the story, but I don’t believe the triple digit speeds as I had a 1988 900 base with a 5 speed that I bought new and though I don’t tend to drive over 85 ever, I once ran it full out heading south on RT 24 south in Massachusetts following a euro BMW 745i (e23) and I think I only made 99 on a very slight downhill. I would think that the 5 speed had a higher top speed than the three speed auto. On the other hand, I once got my predecessor car to a bit over 95 and it only had a two-speed transmission (a 1979 Honda accord hatchback with the semi-automatic transmission), so I guess anything is possible!
The top speed of my 1993 900 S with the 2.1 dohc is 113 indicated and it doesn’t seem stressed doing it.
Your car adventures sound like mine post-college except I had to call on my grandparents for help. Looking back now, it was a string of bad-luck purchases made by someone very broke.
There was a time when I thought the Saab 900 was the ugliest looking car. With its squarish body styling, it’s incredible that the car sold at all.
These days, I look at the car and I like its styling, particularly with the convertible.
Your Saab story reminds me a lot of my 1987 VW Jetta, my one and only experience with a European car. Worst car I’ve ever owned! When it was working right, it was a joy to drive, but it was always breaking down. Bought it in 1997 when it was ten years old. It looked great, a nice gold colour with no rust and immaculate black cloth interior. Drove well and the a/c even worked and it had 4-wheel disc brakes that could stop on a dime! Six weeks after buying the car I had such terrible back pain when driving the car that I ended up tearing apart the driver’s seat to see what was wrong. Turns out VW used a wire frame stretched tight for the backrest with a horsehair padding. The frame had sagged and gave no lower back support at all, so I used some fiberglass tape to tighten it up and it seemed to work ok, but it wasn’t great. Next a balljoint went, then tons of trouble with the mechanical fuel injection (last year for that nonsense), a new starter, rear disc brakes and I went thru multiple power window switches cause they kept failing. The last year I had the thing I hardly ever drove it because it constantly left me stranded.
Never again. I bought a Ford Escort and never looked back.
I worked for a Saab dealer in 1989. This car doesn’t sound any more like a lemon than any of the 900s or 9000s that we sold. It sounds pretty good compared to the Saabs owned by friends during that period.
The 900s got the sixteen valve engine in 1988 I believe, and the base did by 1993, so it was an engine with a higher top speed.
Was excited for the follow-up to the Grand AM, now looking forward to the follow-up to the Saab.
Surprisingly, next week’s COAL turned out to be a decent car. The surprise was it managed to be a good daily driver despite its supposed high miles and reputation.
I guess I was getting a bit ahead of you. I am anxious to read about:
“Nearly ten years later, I would spend eight times that with nothing to show for it in what amounts to the worst auto decision I ever made.”
That was indeed an interesting time…unfortunately, there are about nine more cars before I get there. However, I think you will find it worth the wait.
Sob, SAAB, sob. Welcome to the club….we rescind your membership! For the record your sedan was certainly a classic design…the Swedes could care less for style back then.
Owning a SAAB is a journey in….fortitude and finance. I’ve always loved SAABs, especially a hankering for the late ’80s 900 convertible and the 9000 CL. I finally bought an off-lease ’04 9-3 Aero convertible in 2007…18k miles, 6 speed. We are down to two SAAB repair specialists here in Houston, with the more convenient one very familiar with my baby. I have two friends with ’06 and ’07 convertibles respectively; check that just one, since the ’07 blew it’s engine (and turbo twice) at 85k and once repaired the shop gave him a decent offer for it. Thank God for extended warranties.
My weekender only has 48k miles on it. I’ve put probably $2500 into hydraulic/top repairs; a few weeks ago a spring dropped on my foot from under the dash – a simple yellow plastic clip broke, but is no longer available so you have to buy the entire clutch return spring (but that’s a bargain at $50…). At any given time a funky electronic part malfunctions…turn the car off and back on and it’s gone. Nothing like Swedish electronics (trivia moment: the Gen 1 convertibles were made in Finland; 2nd and last gens in Graz, Austria).
That said, my car remains a looker – I get compliments all the time. It handles like on rails. It’s fast as hell (I chickened out at 125 on a closed track).
It is our 2nd experience with a “Swedish” car – we had a new Volvo S70 that bled us to death financially over 5 years.
While I was greatly anticipating the 9-4X a few years ago when I was in the market for a CUV, only a few hundred made it here before SAAB collapsed in the GM bankruptcy. Those are out there, like a unicorn sighting – you may run into one.
But I’ve learned to never depend on a SAAB as a daily driver if you’ve been exposed to Japanese-levels of reliability….
And bring your wallet….
Oh man does this article bring back memories of my own Saab story. Back in 2005 as a new reporter, my partner gave me his (what I thought to be) lightly-used 1993 Saab 900. I’d always admired the style of these vehicles and I thought, with having about 180000 kms on it, It would be a good vehicle for some time.
How wrong I was. In the eight months I owned it, I replaced the starter, alternator, right front ball joint and wiper solenoid. Then the exhaust system (right after the manifold) fell off. Then the electronics started going wonky. After being left on the road side for the third time, I no longer trusted the car (and my bosses were making noise about how my unreliable car was affecting my ability to work) I traded it (got $600 I think) on an 03 Pontiac Bonneville. Now that was a great car! Matter of fact, I should do a COAL on it sometime!
Yes, please! Not enough Pontiacs here.
Argh…Your-A-Peon cars….never again for me.
Wow. That litany of problems makes anything I’ve driven seem trivial by comparison! When the dealership tells you straight out that it’s a lemon and shouldn’t be driven…bad news. I suppose an asking price of $400 seems like a low price of entry, even if you do have to put some money into it, and $1500 over the course of ownership really isn’t that bad all things considered, but what price headaches and heartbreak?
Still amazed that you got a running, driving car for $350 though. (Even if the “driving” part was intermittent.) Least I’ve ever paid for a car was $800, and that got me a 20 year old V6 Malibu with surface rust and no radio or A/C (both were present but broken). At least it was reliable…
Sounds typical to me .
Pops had two ’66 SAAB Two-Smoke wagons , one new and inexplicably he bought another one in 1970 or so .
Both were junk , rarely ran more than a few days between crapping out ~ the new one was crashed by the SAAB Dealer mechanic whilst trying to figure out why it kept dying suddenly .
-Nate
Man, that is my old Saab 900 exactly (same color, etc). Bought new in Sw Michigan and sold to a neighbor guy who eventually moved to PA. Had 88k on it when I sold it, best car I ever owned. WAY better than the new 1980 Honda Accord I had prior to that, which I had a lot of problems with. Turned me off Hondas. I still drive Saabs to this day, just making a deal on another C900 in fact, something like Saab #28 or 29 I think. And no, Saabs ARE reliable… you just have to take good care of them. I’ve had a few with well over 200k on them and rarely have problems.
I love it when someone buys a POS that is barely still on the road, will not spend what it will take to make the old worn out thing roadworthy again, and condemns the company and its cars when the car that should have been used as a parts car lets them sit.
Maybe…….
It’s *NOT* the car…
I bought a 1983 eight valve, three door 900 Turbo with 143K and drove it for two years. I did nothing to it other than normal maintenance and changed out the transmission oil with synthetic.
Based on that one car, SAABs are *AMAZING*!!!!
But since one car isn’t a representative example, I don’t make that leap.
Now…..the fact that I saw them on a fairly regular basis in my shop would lead me to saying that by and large, they’re decent cars. Not terrible maintenance whores like a lot of European cars,and with minimal maintenance and care, I saw them regularly go a quarter of a million miles.
YMMV…