Two automotive rites of passage that I feel every gear head should experience is to live in a vehicle and to own a $1 vehicle. The romantic idea of living in a van and driving cross-country is certainly appealing to many people, not just gear heads. Vans are automotive lepers, no one really wants to own a van for the driving experience; they need an large appliance to haul the tools of their trade or a comfortable velvet-lined home (or bordello) on wheels. Free vehicles also have great appeal in that they offer a good story, though usually there’s a catch. All the better if you can combine these two rites of passage in one vehicle that allows you to fulfill a dream of moving 1600 kms across the country in an economical fashion.
With my latest Hornet nearing death’s door I had bought an ’81 AMC Eagle SX/4 similar to the one you see above to serve as its replacement. It had the usual rocker rust and other AMC maladies but was certainly salvageable. Then one day, my Dad said a co-worker of his was looking to get rid of an old Jeep and a Chevy van. Would I be interested? Can’t hurt to look.
I was initially far more interested in the Jeep but as it turns out it had been rolled and wasn’t even suitable as a parts car. The van however ran fine, he had purchased it from his ex Father-in-law and used it sparingly to haul building supplies. Since I have no pics of it, you’ll have to settle for what little pics I can find online of windowed, long wheelbase, bottom rung Chevy vans. It says a lot about a vehicle when the only pics you can find online are from fleet auctions. The van had a 305 with an auto tranny, power steering and brakes, one row of cheap vinyl seats in the back for passengers, peeling purple tint and a fair amount of rust. I was also cautioned that a brake line was badly rusted but not wanting to make a return visit to pick it up, I “bought” it and signed over the papers on the spot. As you might guess, the brake line broke on a side street 5 blocks from home as some dummy pulled in front of me. Fortunately again, I avoided an accident and the van and I made it home uninjured.
Once home, it became apparent that the van would be jumping ahead of the Eagle as the next replacement in the beater cycle. Aside from fixing the brake line, replacing shocks, and performing the usual tune-up, all it needed was a metal patch welded over the rust on the bottom of the sliding rear door. I just cut out a big flat piece of sheet metal, welded it, ground down the ugliness and primered it over. Good to go!
There’s something weird about a single 23 year old guy driving an old van that doesn’t have a plumber’s name advertised on the side. People look at you differently, but given the history of the vehicles I had owned that was nothing new to me. It was also the source of endless jokes from my friends, I pretty much set myself up for that. Setting stereotypes aside, it took a bit of time to get used to driving this box. It was considerably larger and bus-like than anything I had previously driven. Also, while the upright seating position allows for excellent visibility, having your feet crammed in a space between the wheel well and the doghouse is pretty annoying.
The other reason it jumped the queue in the beater cycle is that I had just graduated from University and was ready to escape the frozen tundra of Winnipeg and head west to the mountains of British Columbia. A travel van like Paul’s would have been much better but that would have cost money. No I would have to do it very cheaply and therefore improvise. Since the lease was up on the house some friends and I rented at the end of October, I decided to go west in early November exactly 9 years ago.
I loaded up the van with as many of my possessions as I could, trying to get as much furniture in as possible since I would be starting from scratch in BC. I had a cooler full of food on the passenger seat, and clothes and other smaller items on the bench seat. In the cargo area was a couch, a disassembled single bed, a dresser, a TV, computer and a lot of boxes. The only functional item back there was the couch which I slept on and it required quite a crawl to get to. Since I had been working as a bartender through my last couple of years of University, my vague plan was to go town to town in BC until I was offered a bartending job. Little to no planning went into this trip but the idea was to get a winter of skiing under my belt before proceeding with a career related to my degree.
pic via fotosdecarros.com
Setting out on November 1st, the weather decided that I had left too late. A blizzard followed me from Winnipeg to Regina where I slept on the couch in -5°C. Fortunately traction in the snow was not bad on my well worn tires due to the amount of weight in the van. The 300 000+ kms on the old 305 were evident however as it struggled with any hill or wind. For this reason and in the interest of fuel economy I kept to the secondary highways and restricted myself to 90 km/hr. I was in no hurry anyway.
My second night would be spent parked in the shadow of the Big Truck in Sparwood, BC. Little did I know it at the time, but one day I would be driving similar trucks working at the coal mines in the area. That’s right, this COAL writer is a Coal Miner! Anyway, the weather got much worse as the temperature hit -25°C overnight and sleep did not come easy as I shivered in my sleeping bag. Clearly, the romantic notion of living and sleeping in an old van could not be possible much longer. I would have to focus on getting a job soon and renting heated accommodations. For the rest of the trip, I would couch surf with friends or splurge on a crappy hotel room when cold weather wouldn’t allow a night on the couch in the van.
After less than two weeks of wandering around the mountains applying for jobs I was offered a bartending gig at a bar in Invermere, BC. I would never sleep in the van again as a co-worker let me stay on his couch and I soon found reasonable accommodations in a basement suite. The van had performed admirably getting me and my things across the country but it would soon have a new role; that of the party-mobile.
I was in a small mountain boom town full of like-minded people still in their wild years. I happened to have a vehicle that could carry 5 people legally and at least another 10 on the floor in the cargo area. Whose vehicle do you think we took to the bar or bush parties? We could really maximize the sober driver to drunk passenger ratio with this thing. Gas is also cheap when split 10 ways.
As my winter out west turned into a summer and more, it became obvious that the van’s days were numbered. While still mechanically sound, it acquired a pile of stupid little problems that weren’t easily fixed. Towards the end, both front door handles broke and I had caved in the sliding door doing something stupid so the only way in and out was through the barn doors at the back. Not a way to make a graceful exit in any social situation. Furthermore, it would have to pass an out of province safety inspection to be registered in BC and the abuse I had heaped on it would ensure that it would never pass. The good news though is that you won’t have to hear me complain about inspections anymore as all vehicles bought in BC don’t require inspection.
While this van certainly wasn’t sporty it was very versatile. I removed the rear seat a few times (what a battle) to help friends move in a single load. There was almost 10 feet of cargo area. In it’s final month I picked up and hauled home it’s replacement and the subject of next week’s COAL as well. Yup, I would become a motorcycle guy. In the end, the van shared the same fate as the beater that preceded it, it would be hauled away for free and taken to the local junkyard.
My 1st “bought with my own money” vehicle was almost a gently used VW van. It was dark green and had a bare minimum of windows (a kombi-van?). I found it on a dealer’s lot in a small town in Arkansas, just across the river from Memphis, Tn. Not a great driver’s car, like this Chevy, but in 1971 sporty drivers still didn’t have much influence at any car company when it came to vehicle dynamics. 12 years later I would discover my uncle had a non-running twin to my almost van. I had just months before bought my new Fiesta and my uncle wasn’t giving away that van….even to family. He felt the right buyer would get him a nice profit.
I’d still like to know what COAL stands for,
in Curbside terms! No one seems willing
to spell it out for this old 20th century
relic. 😉
Cars Of A Lifetime, I believe.
That’s it. We used to always spell it out in the headline, but stopped doing it somewhere along the way. This place has become such a kaffeeklatsch of old car-loving friends that we have adopted our own language and conventions, and sometimes forget that newcomers still arrive and must be quite puzzled.
Vans are truly wonderful. And you know you’ve finally grown up when you willingly trade in a sports car and a pickup truck to make room for a van.
Let’s not say “grown up” too loudly, though. The sports cars went because I realized they still weren’t as much fun as the motorcycles.
X2
Agree, and motorcycles are cheaper and better on gas. Oops, that sounds grown-up.
No, 727 automatic. Maybe I’ll give writing a try! 🙂
Ah to be in your early 20s again, roaming the countryside with no specific responsibilities or strategy. I did a fair bit of that back in the early 90s, good times… good times.
I had a slightly different take on my van, a ’69 Dodge A-100 Sportsman window van. I gave it a “heart transplant” in the form of a 340 c.i. V-8. It was a perfect Q-ship..lots of fun, could really haul (pun intended!) AND I still own it! Unfortunately, it is in need of restoration, the pictures are from its’ glory days! 🙂
That’s pretty awesome. Does it have a 4 speed? You should do a COAL write-up on it.
Very cool machine! Hopefully you’ll have time to restore it at some point–love the A-series.
My “buckmobile” was a green ’76 Toyota Corona station wagon. I lived in downtown Portland in the early 90’s and it was stolen twice!
Child-molester-Chevy-van solidarity, my friend. Here’s the COAL story of the one in my life: https://www.curbsideclassic.com/cars-of-a-lifetime/coal-1978-chevrolet-van-the-iron-maiden/
I totally get the looks you’d get pulling up in an unmarked white cargo van. And I flatly refused to drive this car when my girlfriend was involved, as I felt sure the first time I pulled up to her house in it would be the last time her parents would let me have anything to do with her. My rustbucket Pinto was, unbelievably, the much better choice for our dates.
Nice COAL. I couldn’t imagine one of these things with manual steering, you’d have Popeye arms in no time. My usual defense when faced with molester jokes was that my van had windows and was blue; it couldn’t be a molester van.
That being said, a drunk friend decided one night to write “free candy” in spray paint on the side of the van. Fortunately he was too inebriated to make it legible. It just looked like an ugly blob of white o the side of the van.
You have displayed a remarkable ability to squeeze the last few drops of life from your vehicles. Lives shortened by inspection laws, that is. I wonder how long the van could have soldiered on in a land of no inspections.
I am on record as being no fan of this generation of Chevy Vans. But when you get it for a buck, well . . .
GM’s current Sport(y)van.
Yes! I love it! Spent most of 5 years working for a small town furniture store, the only vehicle they had at the time was a ’93 GMC Vandura 1500 that the original owner purchased new; total stripper: 305, no A/C, no cassette. I’d of bought it off the store when it closed, but for the oft repeated Manitoba safety inspection.
The tires were trash and I gained lots of experience getting it unstuck in winter, almost always stuck rather pathetically. Summer DOES get warm in Canada (contrary to the stereotype), and the last of A/C made it an oven inside. That was mostly remedied by cracking the window and swinging open the little flap of glass for the vents. Got a bee sting on the highway resting my arm on the open window.
I had the handle on the driver’s door break, too. After some musical handles, it was finally settled on the passenger handle on the driver door, and the passenger handle was replaced with the passenger window crank. One of the loops that the main rear panel door catches also broke out on the road, swinging open mid trip. That was held in place with bungee cords ’til a few pieces were switched again.
Windows open or closed, the inside had a treacherous roar, making the stereo mostly useless. Side of the driver’s seat had long since deteriorated. Rust and poor door seals made it possible to see it of the van, on places you shouldn’t be able to. The footwell was narrow and cramped. That said, it did have full windows, visibility was great.
The only thing it couldn’t carry was king sized mattresses. Otherwise it was the most cavernous vehicle this side of cube vans. Hauled everything from sofa sets to drywall.
That van was a worthless piece of junk. But it was MY worthless piece of junk; I loved that van. It was always so loyal, if stubborn sometimes.
Good article. Gave me a good memory trip, thanks.
Hey, I applied for a maintenance Engineer job at the Sparwood mine once.
Didn’t get it, and never did manage to move to BC but that’s OK. Nice story, looking forward to the next installment..
Nice story and I too have slept in a Van though mine was a Minivan. Slept in a 95 Voyager for three weeks in September-October 2012 while going from New York to California and that sure was a hoot. The first night in Ohio near Cleveland was chilly and think there was ice on the windows by morning as was a night in Oklahoma at the Alabaster Caverns I think and definitely that night at the Grand Canyon Campground in Arizona.
Van for a dollar? Bah! I got paid to drive one.
These G10 / 20 series were actually not bad when new, if optioned well. My normal route van was an ’84 Chevy long wheelbase with 305 4-barrel and automatic overdrive. It had high back bucket seats and no windows on the sides of the cargo area. It rode smoothly and had plenty of pep. At the time, the van was only about two years old and fairly low mileage.
Occasionally, a driver on another route would need more capacity, so I’d end up with their 6 cylinder, 3 speed automatic, short wheelbase version. Noisier, with a much choppier ride and less comfy, due to the standard seat with a low back. To add insult to injury, the miles per gallon was noticeably less than my normal 305!
These were lacking in foot room, but it wasn’t a big problem for me because most of my stops were only a few minutes apart. The longest leg of my route took maybe 30 or 40 minutes of seat time.
Many was the time at the end of the day when I’d park one of these vans, file my paperwork, climb into my ’84 Chevette, and drive away feeling like my butt was gliding an inch off of the ground!
Back when I was in the Air Force (mid-seventies) one of my good friends bought a Ford Econoline van as his daily driver. Steve’s van was newer than the one Nelson describes above and it was in better condition. It was basically a cargo van with windows; the only permanent seats were the two up front. For additional seating we would just load bean bags and lawn chairs into the back and carry on. Not very safe but we were young and dumb and it worked out okay. As is typically the case the van was the vehicle of choice when going to concerts, sporting events or wherever. One of the guys in our group was a non-drinker and he usually got assigned as the designated driver. I think the all time capacity record was the 12 people we had for a concert down at the Oakland-Alameda County Coliseum. Come to think of it we did “sleep” in the van a few times; we were only a couple of hours from Reno and the casinos. We would drive up there to gamble/take in the sights and use the van to crash in when we needed a break. Ah, youth.
Could someone, please, explain why did this model had “Sport” in its name? What was sporty about it?
Kind of like a “gourmet” toaster.
These things being used a micro buses killed many people. Most of those people were young, youthful sports teams going off joyfully down the highway, having a collision with something. Many times the collision has ended van passenger lives. These things perform poorly in side impact collisions…..t -bones, and offset collisions. That is why they have been banned and outlawed in states, provinces and municipal places. Seriously. Glad to see them go.
http://www.nationalpost.com/fatal+crash+unfit+road+rcmp/687815/story.html
I went cross country with some buddies in 1980 (CT to CA and all over, at age 20) in a similar van. With a little modification the center engine cover did a fine job of keeping the bong ready at hand….
My uncle drove a windowless Chevrolet pedovan for a long, long time. He’d still have it if it hadn’t died. Nobody looked at him funny, though, he is 6’5″, 350 pounds of massive.
When the van died, though, his next car was a Nissan NX. I still can’t figure out how he squeezed himself into that car.
Good story and comments .
Old raper vans , whew .
-Nate
Mine is a 97 Ford E250. I got it from my dad a few years back.
It’s a windowless white van like so many others.
My twin niece and nephew (dad’s grandkids) loved to play in the van when they were small. Lot’s of room to bounce around and be rowdy and noisy.
Grandpa was daycare for the twins and he’d take them out to play in it while it was parked at the curb next to their house.
Hmm, white van, no windows, bouncing around with kids yelling in it, nosey, er, “responsible” neighbors?
Yes, the cops did show up.
Yes, it will always be the Stalker Van.