Backyard Classics: A Saturday Afternoon Stroll at the In-Laws

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When you marry into a family, sometimes it’s wise to not open your mouth too soon. Give it a dozen or so years.

There is also the spectrum of wisdom.  At one end, you have that which has freshly fallen from the proverbial Ye Olde Turnip Truck; at the other end, the Divine Keeper of all that is wise.  Somewhere in the middle of that spectrum falls your humble author, who recently strolled around his in-laws’ six-acre homestead with camera in hand.

Put these two philosophical observations together and you wind up with this delightful article.  So let’s go for a walk before anyone finds out what we’re up to.  I know the stories of all of these fine machines.

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First up is this ’57 Ford Ranchero.  It has been sitting in this location since at least 1993, when I first starting dating the wife.  It actually belongs to one of her two older brothers, who claims it has a factory 312 cubic inch V8.  That sounds plausible, except…

1957 Ford Ranchero-05

there is no mention of it in sales literature.  A few books have made mention of limited availability of the 312 in 1957, so perhaps he is correct.

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Sadly, the most action this old Ranchero has seen in the last two-plus decades occurred a few years ago. That same brother-in-law was keeping a few goats on the property, and it seems the Billy was fond of standing on the roof.  Having the goats there actually was a good thing, as this Ranchero was nearly covered with foliage before Billy arrived.

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Several yards behind the Ranchero is this 1967 Mercury Monterey convertible.  One of 2,673 Monterey convertibles made that year, my father-in-law acquired it in the late ’80s from a car dealer who’d taken it on trade–without a drive train.

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(He’s) Always meaning to get around to it, but meantime this Monterey has spent years languishing near the woods.

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Despite the completely sad state of its appearance, the car has served a purpose as the delivery room for an untold number of cats.  I’ve dug around the inside of this Mercury a time or two to retrieve kittens for little people to play with.

1967 Mercury-13

While my father-in-law (previously, you met him here) occasionally intends to get around to the poor Mercury, it’s doubtful it will ever look this good again.

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Sitting beside the Mercury is this 1950 International 3/4-ton pickup. It also belongs to my Ranchero-owning brother-in-law.

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The first time I opened the hood on this International, I was pleasantly surprised to see it possesses an overhead-valve engine.

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Perhaps its being an L-120 series explains the engine?

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It was found parked in someone’s back yard in downtown St. Louis, in the early ’80s, by which time it had been sitting for about 15 years.  My father-in-law tinkered with it for a few minutes and got it running, and they drove it back home.  It was refreshed while my brother-in-law was in high school; he graduated in 1983 and promptly joined the United States Army. The truck has been sitting there pretty much since then.

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The interior still doesn’t look too bad considering the truck’s storage conditions.

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Sitting on the other side of the Mercury is this F-100 pickup; I want to say it’s titled as a 1962 model.  While this truck is referred to as a unibody, it really isn’t one.

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This Custom Cab model is also the only “unibody” I’ve seen with a long bed–I don’t know how rare or common that was.

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The wraparound rear window is another item of uncertain commonality.

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Opening the hood does not reveal the original straight six; somewhere along the way, the tiny six hit puberty and grew into a 429 cubic inch V8.  I heard this pickup run back around 1995, when my brother-in-law was driving it, and it sounded great at the time.  It’s been here since the late ’90s.

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Last, we have this boat.  Yes, you’re right, we don’t cover boats here–but we do cover automotive-styling fads over the course of time.

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And it’s certainly apparent that a boat with tail fins has exerted some influence on automotive design.

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Here’s a closer look at one of those fabulous marine fins.

Watching these vehicles deteriorate has been painful; still, presenting them to all you CC readers does seem like a great way to preserve them.

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