Camouflage was a look when I was growing up in the ’80s. There was this period when it was mainstream and perfectly normal for even grade school kids to show up wearing camo trousers or backpacks. At least it was in Michigan. I’ve been hunting exactly once, but it was for pheasants and at a hunting club here in Chicagoland. I’ve also been to the Upper Peninsula (da Yoo-Pee) and also seen plenty of deer in and around the Flint area, which was home base. Never the manliest thing on wheels, I rocked my own pair of camouflage trousers with any number of t-shirts I had in rotation and just knew I was stylin’ and that much closer to emulating my older brother and many of the cool kids in my classroom.
Camouflage is supposed to aid in concealing the wearer by making him or her blend in with his or her immediate surroundings. The wrap on this modern BMW has an effect that is exactly one-hundred eighty degrees from that. How did someone not see this car? Texting? The influence of controlled substances? It is absolutely inexcusable that someone would miss this 435i while parked, very legally, at the curb in front of the local outpost of a nationwide health club chain. Even from just these pictures, what would this camo Beamo be blending into so as to make it invisible to traffic?
Imagine being the owner of this BMW and returning to it at the end of the weekend for the drive home, only to find this. I would be livid. Of the six model years between 2013 and ’18 that the F32 generation of 4 Series was available, 2015 was the production peak, with almost 152,400 produced. Parts for this one should be available, but there goes that wrap. The insurance company wouldn’t total out this car for this damage, would they? (Don’t ask me – I’m in underwriting, not claims. “Stay in ya lane!“, it has been said, and wisely so.)
Once upon a time about half my life ago when I had a bit of a belly, crunches weren’t my favorite exercise, but I might prefer the younger, round-bellied me experiencing those sensations again over having to deal with the big crunch that happened here. The health club in the background is known for its high intensity training, which seems to echo the intensity of the pattern temporarily tattooed on this car. Here’s hoping the owner had good insurance and a friend at the car wrap store.
Edgewater, Chicago, Illinois.
Sunday, February 26, 2023.
Camo wrap pattern & BMW seem such a discordant combination. The damage might have been the result of a self styled art critic losing it.
My reaction is the opposite: Of course someone hit your car – they couldn’t see it due to the effective city camo job. Just look at it – the gray of concrete, the reddish color of bricks and awnings and the black of windows, this is the perfect urban camouflage car. Dude, if you don’t want people hitting your car in the city, paint it green!
That is pretty unfortunate…….the rear wheel looks like it is not positioned properly in the wheel opening, especially if you compare it to the front wheel in the picture. Since the front wheel looks properly positioned, I don’t think it is simply a matter of perspective. I suspect the rear wheel or tire got hit too and thus the rear suspension is damaged, or the structure is “bent”. That could be some real money.
This appears to be an M4, from the rear exhaust and bumper design (though in theory those parts could have been added onto a base 4 Series coupe, as is too often the case).
Is it totaled? In my state, repairs estimated over 75% of actual cash value means it is a total loss. I plugged a hypothetical 2015 M4 with 100,000 miles into Kelly Blue Book and get a trade in value of about $24,000.00. If it is just a 428i coupe with the M4 parts added, it’s only worth $9,800.00
Wow – thanks for doing that research. I did confirm via license plate search (I always blank it out for cars I feature) that it’s a 435i, so kudos to the owner for the convincing external M4 add-ons.
It’s interesting with the cost of car repairs having increased so dramatically over the past, say, ten years how cars seem to be regularly totaled out than repaired. Materials cost more, and designs are more complex.
That’s my reaction too, it looks like a pixelization of its surroundings.
The question is if the city cleans up the debris before the owner sees it, how long will it take before the owner notices the damage?
You and Matt make good points, and I had to re-look at these pictures and the relationship of the colors in the background to what’s on the wrap. Thinking about it, as if I was driving down the street, my eye / peripheral vision would be trained to recognize a car as something having a solid block of color. I do wonder what happened here.
Corner dent in search of a Camry/whitegoods/appliance.
BMW?
What BMW?
I’m glad you got a picture of this BMW (talking about the car & wrap itself and not focusing on the damage) – there’s a Mercedes sedan that I see occasionally with a woodland camo wrap, but I’ve never been able to get a picture of it. I agree with Rob above that the car and the wrap are quite a discordant combination.
Speaking of wraps, just last week I saw a Tesla in an unusual dark tan color. Seemed a bit unusual to me, and then I noticed the “paint” seemed a bit flat, and I figured it was really a wrap, and not paint. I thought it was funny that someone would take the effort and pay the cost to wrap their car in… tan.
Oh, and regarding hunting, I go deer hunting every year – and I take our minivan. Not exactly a stereotypical hunting-mobile (though we butcher and process on site… if I had to transport a deer carcass, I’d use a pickup!). And I always find it interesting what other kinds of vehicles are parked alongside the roads during hunting season. Usually it’s just ordinary SUVs and trucks – only rarely do I see something like a camo-wrapped F-250.
There are so many Tesla’s in my area that it’s inevitable that wraps are appearing on them. Everything from flat black to hot pink, some iridescent, but I’ve not seen camo yet.
I just like that the technology exists to make a wrap versus a permanent paint job. Just yesterday, I saw a Maserati SUV (a Levante?) with a matte pink wrap on it, and I thought to myself how I was glad it was a wrap in case the owner changed his or her mind later.
Ouch! No one should have to come back to find their car messed up like this! Not EVEN the owner of a BMW ! Never could understand the big deal about them, but just my opinion .This is a strange camo combination. Familiar with green military as well as black, white, and gray and have worn both, but the extra color on this car, looks like a reward for someone selling MARY KAY cosmetics 💄 to police! 😉. Have seen many unusual paint jobs but this is the strangest. If a guy was driving this to any gym I know of at that time, he must have taken a lot of lot of ribbing. 😎
I’ll agree that the color combo of this camo is unusual, but I like this combo. I suppose it’s not unlike something I’d see in a fast-fashion clothing store as a print on a hoodie or windbreaker, just for one example. It’s probably not something I would do to my own car, but I’m sure that when this one was all washed and shined up, it made a bold statement and I could see pride of ownership.
Just took another look at photo. Looks like a PLANET FITNESS. Owner of THIS car must have come from Planet Witless 🙄! Just kidding, I think 🤔!!!
Driver ed class practicing parallel parking…
On a serious note, I will say that on the occasions that I’ve had a rental car and had to park it in my neighborhood, I’ve been glad I was paying attention in drivers’ ed the days we went over the geometry of effective parallel parking!
Bimmers are trendy cars so mayhap the discordant note this ‘camo’ wrap produces is intentional .
Bummer that it got hit, why I try to never curb park, I see far too many hits just like this on major traffic arteries .
Scads of Teslas here too, many in trendy matte finish, it n ever occurred to me they might simply be wraps .
-Nate
That must be one plasticky car, under the plastic bumper cover all I see is more plastic.
I would be double disappointed to come back to that scene: Someone hit the corner of my nice BMW AND they put camo wrap all over it!
Funny how within my lifetime BMWs went from cars for snobs who looked down on American trash to… this. Yeah it was Camaros that were tacky trailer park cars, this machine exudes taste and class!
Didnt see it ossifer.
Haha! This wins.
BMW? Thought it was a Honda, on which I’ve seen similar wraps. Or at least I THINK I’ve seen them…
Speaking of the camo wrap, is part of the problem here that BMWs have got to be so darned common? The owner puts on an urban camo wrap to make his/her car distinct from other cars – only here the camo seems to have worked all too well as camo! Shame. That shouldn’t even happen to a BMW.
Camo pattern decals are available for models (!!!), but I’ve never felt the need. Nor for a 4-series.
What BMW? Where??
I see a Dodge Charger with similar camo coloring in Livonia, Michigan, with some regularity. It’s fairly eye catching, and actually not terrible looking.