Ed Stembridge’s Lumina APV sighting got me wondering, “What If a broughamier Dustbuster Silhouette minivan was made in order to more directly compete with Town & Country?” If Lee Iacocca was running GM, he would no doubt have wanted to make his mark in some way. Di-Noc and wire wheel covers were right up his alley.
BTW, this is totally for humor purposes.
That does not look terribly tacky just somewhat.
I don’t know what Chrysler’s average age demographic was at the time. But that Dustbuster nose seems waaay too progressive for the Chrysler clientele at the time. As too, the high mounted tail lights. Especially so, given the concurrent New Yorker, Dynasty and LeBaron were so brick-like in terms of styling.
Dunno, my folks were about 35 when the bought a 95 Voyager at a end of year sale. My folks tend to be more loyal to reliability than brands and Consumer Reports recommended those Minivans.
I would suspect the Town & Country must’ve appealed to a significantly younger age bracket than the rest of the Chrysler lineup at the time.
Yea I think so, but my folks are frugal so I seriously doubt they would have bought anything above the base model.
For Lido to even consider this prototype Brendan, you absolutely need whitewalls. And Chrysler parts bin flipper-type door handles, to control costs.
It might’ve meant the Caprice wagon and Buick Roadmaster Estate would have been phased out much sooner than 1995 and 1996 respectively.
Holy crap that looks cool! *seriously*
Nice photoshop work.
Bizarrely, that isn’t bad at all. The chrome accents work from the side profile.
I thought the occasional PT Cruiser with the woodie options were okay as well.
Short of the wire covers, that is very much the approach to current color and trim.
Add some lacy or retro snowflake wheels with a Buick crest (skip the whitewalls).
Add a Buick crest on the front door on the black – you know the right spot!
When I had my PT, I used to cringe whenever Id see the contact paper woodies. I think that was the beginning of the end for those. Cheap gimmicks to pimp up base model cars = Fail. On the other hand, there were a few companies that had real wood inserts that looked kind of classy. But they were also installed on full on custom PTs that had hotrod paint jobs, were lowered, custom wheels, etc for a full on retro surf woodie look.
The el cheapo PT complete with black bumpers but with paper slapped on just looks tacky:
http://www.allpar.com/reviews/2002/pt-cruiser.html
As much as I don’t like whitewalls, this car has a coherent ’50s surfer look. The only blunder is the dual exit rear pipes with the ‘fake’ lakes pipes.:
http://www.autotrucktoys.com/ptcruiser/Auto-Tech-Plastics-Chrysler-PT-Cruiser-PT-Woody-II-Kit–PRD12464.aspx
Real wood conveys a “sustainable” image, and has been used in a number of recent concept cars specifically for that purpose, although not on the outside like that. But the wood grain chose has a contemporary look, and it’s a look I’m seeing on an increasing number of architectural projects. The way it relates to the lines of this van work very well indeed.
It’s time to bring it back…and I wouldn’t be at all surprised if that happens. “Sustainably harvested Di-Noc on your new Prius V, madam?
I figure the Di-Noc on the Priux V would work best if it had a pattern that looked like bamboo floors, as everyone knows bamboo is much more “sustainable” than regular hardwood ;p
I wouldn’t be surprised if the upcoming “Grand Wagoneer” had a woodgrain option, and it would almost work in that application…
Along with Hemp mats and seat covers
You guys may think you’re kidding….my 2010’s interior hard plastics really are made from grass:
“For the Prius, Toyota used a new range of plant-derived ecological bioplastics made from the cellulose in wood or grass instead of petroleum. The two principal crops are kenaf (a member of the hibiscus family and related to cotton and okra) and ramie, commonly known as China grass and one of the strongest natural fibres, similar to flax in absorbency and density. Toyota says this is a particularly timely breakthrough for plant-based eco-plastics because 2009 is the United Nations’ International Year of Natural Fibres, which covers kenaf and ramie.” (Wikipedia)
What has been seen cannot be unseen…
It’s a small step from Lumina to Laminate.
I’m not the biggest minivan fan as youve probably noticed, but I must admit that improves on the original, but it needs whitewalls for true broughaminess
I have to admit to liking the looks of this thing. If the interior were done right, with real wood trim and nice leather, I think it would be a winner.
Wow this Silhouette really is “The Cadillac of Minivans”.
If Lee Iacocca ran GM? Hey, If I ran GM I would do this in a heartbeat!
I would make some adjustments in how the woodgrain is applied, but that’s not a half-bad looker.
Never anything wrong with a little woodgrain on various wagons and vans.
Now that you bring it up, I am not sure why this was not offered on the Dustbuster vans(especially the Oldsmobile) GM offered the fake wood on the Buick Roadmaster until 1996(the last year the car was offered) you could get a Chrysler minivan with fake wood until 1995.
Why not just order one in black with these great looking wood panels and tint the windows…
Could I have ordered a minivan in darth vader black like the Impala SS or Mercury Marauder a decade ago? I don’t think I’ve ever seen one that color.
I’ve heard tales of people doing L67 swaps on these. Black + tint + blower… Vader van indeed!
Hmm, if Iacocca was in charge wouldn’t it have a stand up grille with a cubic zirconia hood ornament?
A coworker bought a Chevy Dustbuster in ’92-’93. Same gunmetal gray as my ’88 Olds Touring Sedan. Aside from the exterior styling, I was impressed with the build quality of the thing. The body panels were a direct takeoff from the Pontiac Fiero-plastic panels bonded to a steel space frame. As such, the door frames were a work of art-beautifully finished. And the modular seating-fantastic. I was embarrassed that I had bought a new ’90 Dodge Caravan that turned out to be a total piece of crap from transmissions with the lifespan of fruit flies to a Mitsubishi V6 that developed a smoking problem from day one.
It needs planking type wood grain, like on some 1960s Mercury rag tops. It would then look like a real land yacht, albeit a capsized one….
Or maybe a glass bottom boat if it has a moon roof…
As bizarre as it may seem, this actually would have made a LOT of sense had it been done in the day. I was a kid in the 80’s and I remember that many electronics items had fake woodgrain slapped all over them. Hell we had an Atari 2600…a freaking VIDEO GAME CONSOLE that had woodgrain strips! This looks strangely like that. Although I think that whole trend started to fade around ’85-86, these vans came out in around ’87 as I remember. Still, a futuristic design incorporating something as earthy as woodgrain is about as early 80s as it gets.
The 2600 had wood so it would match your Curtis-Mathes console TV.
I almost spit my drink out laughing at the ‘sustainable prius’ comments! I think its laughable that the hybrid kool-aid drinkers actually BELIEVE that tripe! The same ones who dispose of their (same battery technology) cel phones every year or so because the batteries no longer hold a charge! BAHAHAHA!!!!
Anyone TRULY concerned with ‘sustainability’ or reducing waste would keep an older, simpler car running for as long as possible. An old air-cooled VW can be perpetually repaired and kept alive, and often do. How many hybrids will come, slouch along, and get turned into Chinese tuna cans in the life time of a VW bug? Or Mopar A-body? Even as disposable as corollas/camrys are they do hang in there LONG after dead and expensive batteries as well as electrical nightmares will kill all those hybrids…
Glad you’re enjoying the site. It’s fun when an antique Bug scurries by. I can usually smell it before I see it, unless the valves are screaming ‘adjust me before I burn up!’
Are we really doing the anti-hybrid screed?
http://www.consumerreports.org/cro/news/2011/02/the-200-000-mile-question-how-does-the-toyota-prius-hold-up/index.htm
Oh, I know, everything would be better if we just went back to running lawnmower engines in our cars (with leaded fuel of course). Sorry, that’s old tech.
I don’t care about sustainability or reducing waste (well, I do care about that I suppose). I care about advancements in automotive technology, and I care about putting my money where my mouth is. Our 2011 Prius gets 55+ mpg in the summer. (And yes, I’m fully aware that it could take decades for that to pay for itself. Don’t care; I gave my money to Toyota, not Exxon.) Best car I’ve ever owned, by far. Course, coming from a 97 Saturn that leaked oil almost as fast as I could pour it in, that isn’t saying much. Bottom line, It IS possible to simultaneously have an interest in old cars and respect innovation.
And what kind of crappy phone do you have whose battery needs replacing every year?
The original BMC Mini got between 50-55 mpg depending on where you get your info. That was on ONE drive system, and it just so happens that the platform lent itself well to racing. Simple design, and brilliant. I just don’t see the ‘innovation’ in having double the complexity to accomplish 1959 results. From a ‘gee whiz’ perspective, taking an interest in the technology itself is a bit more valid. True innovation would apply to the perfecting of EFI. Does more for economy, performance, and emissions than any other one innovation I can come up with off the top of my head.
Buy what you want, its a free country. Well sort of, since the gubmint bribes you to buy what it thinks you should by dangling a few tax credits (your own money to start with, fyi) to toe the line and buy hybrid. That said, reliability issues in cars these days can usually be traced to electrical gremlins. A flickering dash lite, a possessed power window…these things are niggling issues that infuriate an owner. Issues with ABS, Toyotas infamous accelerator issues, and even the 4wd actuator solenoids on 80’s-90s Fords make for issues that are down right scary, even life threatening. Im not about to rely on a whole separate drivetrain based on electrics in ANY car. No thank you!
Considering the upfront cost of a hybrid, the nitemares that lurk after a few miles of banging a tin can around the road and shaking loose all those electrical doodads for a few measly mpgs, its obvious that the majority of hybrid owners are just trying to say ‘look at me, im green!’. With all the flaws of the system, no enthusiast pretentions whatsoever, no style, and no longevity I think its a complete ripoff. A turbo minicooper gets near 38 mpg hwy. A GTI just over 30. There are some owners of MDS Hemis in the LX cars claiming mpgs in the high 20s. All of these and many others are MUCH more substantial cars and have actual charm and appeal beyond a few mpgs.
In the end, the only real motivation to pursue mpgs is to save money. Dropping $2K on a 15 year old corolla and hell even doubling that going thru it to make sure its stone reliable puts you at an upfront investment of $4K. Last I heard, a hybrid is going to cost you $22K for the most bargain basement version, they range over $40K depending on the model. That hybrid has to save a minimum of $18K to start making sense. How long will that actually take?
What it really boils down to is this: I paid cash for a Hemi Ram that gets maybe 20mpg hwy if I can control my lead foot. I love that rig. Taking on a car payment to save a few measly $$ in exchange for a car I hate is NOT worth it no matter what the economics of it are.
BTW, the battery ‘not holding a charge’ after a year is a gross exaggertation, but the run time is drastically reduced after a year and degrades exponentially. Ive gotten 4 years before I was charging a battery twice a day minimum. For a $400 iPhone, that’s a paltry expense…especially since upgrades are inevitable every 2 years or so as it is. Some people I know who always need the ‘latest thing’ change phones like I change rolls of toilet paper in the bathroom. We’re talking cars here. Much more $$ involved and much greater impact when they fail.
Turning it upside down, I see a wooden boat hull. More accurately, a glass-bottom boat with a wooden hull. 🙂
And an opera light to the rear of the rear door? Wiring challenge, sure, but it could be done so tastefully!
Naw, wire them from the taillights and set ’em up so they’ll flash with the turn signals and brake lights….
Though not my taste, it does “work”. I’m sure it would have sold pretty well.
I wonder if woodgrain might helped to improve the appearance of the Honda Element? 😉
What are you talking about? The Element’s fine as is. 😉 Now the Aztek, that’d be a challenge.
In all seriousness, I gained more respect for the Element when I figured out it was an AWD wagon with decent ground clearance, a manual option and an interior that can be cleaned out with a wet rag…
Modernist lines and wood trim. I guess you’d pick this up at your IKEA dealer?
It actually doesn’t have a fancy car grill that is actually seen as a class for the more expensive vehicles as chrysler 300 as shown in cargrillsaccessories.com
I thought for a second what if these dustbuster vans had wood grain on the sides nice alloys that it would be cool then i was like i wonder if it was optional on any of them ?? I go to look and see this thread. It then occured to me i wasnt the only one wondering these things. A Buick version would have been hot too. And they would have had old station wagon names too…….Lumina APV KingsWood….. Cutlass Cruiser( the A body should have been the Ciera from the rip and its wagon version Ciera Cruiser) and Trans Sport Safari.