I was almost home on a Friday evening in February when I spotted this Escort Squire Wagon.
I was pretty tired from an eventful week at work, and I could feel the first indications of a pretty severe head cold. I needed desperately to fill myself full of various cold medications and fall quickly asleep in my new reclining chair while watching TV. Nonetheless, I parked Betsy at the corner and got out the camera that I keep in the glovebox.
The batteries in the camera were dead, of course. I sighed at the inevitability of Murphy’s Law as it applied to cameras and car-spotting, and resigned myself to using the camera on my admittedly-cheap cell phone. I wasn’t going to let this little red wagon be The One That Got Away.
I could tell right away that the Escort and the camper van behind it were a matched set; that’s a towbar beneath the black vinyl cover in front of the bumper. Perhaps the owner of the Escort was in the camper, wondering why some idiot was taking pictures of his old station wagon.
The idiot in question saw something he could identify with when he took a closer look at the front; that’s one battered mug, and I was feeling a bit beat up myself. Based on the absence of a blue oval Ford badge in the center of the grill, I came to the conclusion that this was a 1981 model, the first year for the Escort in North America.
I was getting more and more interested. How often do you see a surviving example of the first year of anything? It’s like seeing someone still using an original iPhone. Early Adopters are all too frequently Beta Testers.
In contrast with the front, the rear of the car was dent-free. I could see that the wagon was full of junk miscellaneous items, but in deference to the owner’s privacy, I only glanced at the interior out of the corner of my eye. I didn’t notice what kind of transmission it had, but since this car is a tow-behind, let’s go out on a limb and assume that it doesn’t have an automatic.
The globe badge went hand in hand with Ford’s marketing strategy for the Escort at that time; it was touted as “The New World Car,” and “Designed To Take On The World,” among other things. It did indeed share much with the European Mark III Escort, but the American version had a bit more chrome and the battering-ram bumpers favored by our beloved Nanny State. In this particular case, the car even displays that very American indicator of a Luxurious Wagon, Di-Noc Vinyl Exterior Simulated Woodgrain.
I really didn’t know how to feel about this car. I was of course happy to spot it, but it was such a study in contrasts, and such a combination of things that I love and things that I can’t abide.
On the one hand, it’s the sort of small, practical car that I’m drawn to, and it’s a wagon to boot; you could haul a lot of junk in this wagon and not use a lot of gas doing so.
On the other hand, Ford took this simple, honest car and slathered it with the aforementioned Simulated Woodgrain, with Ford’s trademark white borders. The girl next door is wearing a bit too much make-up! Honey, in my universe, there’s no such thing as an Escort Country Squire.
Besides, I’m the son of a Chevy Man, and this is a Ford. I devoted considerable energy to ridiculing Fords when I was a child. Ford wagons in particular were targets of my scorn.
Whenever I see a Ford wagon covered with Simulated Woodgrain, I smile a bit and remember the 1961 or 1962 Country Squire that belonged to a slow-driving alcoholic who lived in the hick town where I grew up. He was constantly getting into minor fender benders and having arguments with mailboxes, but in that time and place the police frequently looked the other way regarding that kind of behavior. I’ll never forget the moment I noticed that the driver’s side headlight on the drunk’s wagon was held in place with a couple of nails. We called it the Country Squirrel, on account of the owner’s addiction to Squirrel Juice.
But on the other hand, why should a grown man hang onto the prejudices preferences of his childhood? Grow up, Michael R. Hayes!
This rear view makes for a pretty desolate scene, and it’s admittedly fairly typical of Western Washington in the wintertime. A faded old car on a gray February evening! But perhaps I’m getting a bit carried away with the dark imagery here; this car is in very good shape for 33 years old; for cars and dogs, that’s a pretty impressive age.
With any old car that has survived to an advanced age, the most intriguing question is always, “Why did this particular car survive when most of its contemporaries have long since been turned into soup cans and washing machines?”
One clue is that awful Di-Noc. An older person, who would equate Simulated Wood Grain with Luxury, was probably the first owner of this car. Chances are this car’s first owner babied it and gave it a nice, cozy garage to sleep in, and kept it for several years. A baby boomer such as myself would have laughed at the thought of owning a woody station wagon; that’s what our parents and the town drunk in a town full of drunks drove.
Everything considered, I’m glad this car has survived so long, and I’m glad I took the time to take that second look. Hopefully, it’s nowhere near the twilight of its useful existence; I’d love to see it again, when I have a better camera to use.
Related reading: 1981-1990 Escort CC
There’s a song written about this very car:
http://www.arrogantworms.com/music/carfull-of-pain/
Nice looking car. I remember when the Escort was first introduced to the USA. Although I liked its styling, particularly in station wagon form, I’ve never been a fan of front-wheel drive.
This 1981 Escort is a far better car than that 1980 Pinto wagon it replaced. I had one of those Pintos….drove it for 6 years—-very glad when my life/career progressed to the point I could upgrade
Wow, a sealed beam Escort. I can’t even remember the last time I saw a sealed beam Escort in the junkyard. I knew a girl in high school that had a 3 door hatch Escort of this vintage, it was the basest of the basest plain jane Escorts in “I don’t care anymore” beige.
In the last few days we’ve had:
1) “hearing-aid beige”
2) “artificial limb beige”
and now
3) “I don’t care anymore” beige.
All apt descriptors.
Yes, my “telephone beige” descriptor is getting a little dated, and will not resonate with those who did not grow up with rotary dial phones made by Western Electric in Indianapolis.
All these meditations on the various shades of beige remind me of a 1981 or 1982 Mercury Lynx that belonged to a co-worker. It was his first car, and he was very proud of it; he even put vanity plates on it. That little car was painted Everlasting Ennui Beige, but to his eyes, it was probably more like Ferrari Red.
“telephone beige”
Yes, my “telephone beige” descriptor is getting a little dated, and will not resonate with those who did not grow up with rotary dial phones made by Western Electric in Indianapolis.
You mean like the dial set in my living room ? .
Still connected , I like it because I can easily hear the peals of the ringer bells when I’m snoozing in my recliner…..
For cars I prefer Desert Beige , this being that odd shade of beige with *just* a hint of rose color in it, looks nice on 1930’s & 1940’s cars and trucks mostly .
Truth be told I don’t much like beige vehicles , too bland although my old 1985 Mercedes 300TD Euro. is beige and looks nice if bland .
-Nate
Funny you mention rotary phones. I’m 28 years old and I was at a house and asked if I could use their phone since my cell was dead. She said, “Over on that table.” and looked at another woman her age, laughed and said “If you even know how to work it! Have you even seen one of those before.”
I said “I’m driving a ’63 VW Bus, with a functioning 8-track tape player and a brown case full of tapes. I’m certainly not typical and yes I have seen and know how to operate a rotary telephone.”
“Diarrhea dark beige”
I hated the sealed beams on my ’81 SS wagon, so much so that I cut and mounted plexiglass covers to make them more ‘aero’. I had plans to get a scrap grille, glass it over again for aero, and paint it red to match the car.
Thankfully the cracked block at 12,000 miles made me change my mind.
And my car. After the new block went in I sold the thing and got a significantly funner ’68 Javelin 343. Totally skewered the reasons I got the Blister in the first place, but heck, a guy’s gonna do what a guy’s gonna do.
These were pretty common beaters in my highschool parking lot. The Escort was the best selling car in the US in 1982. Mysteriously, the entire first generation has almost disappeared completely. I see at least 50 1st gen Rabbits, Civics, or Accords, 20 Omnis or Horizons, and a dozen Chevettes or Starlets for every surviving 1st generation Escort or Lynx. Although they weren’t as nice to drive as their impressive specifications suggested they’d be, I don’t recall them having any stand-out fatal flaws in the mid-’80s. What happened to them all?
I believe there was a head issue with the engine on the early Escorts.
The head cracked on my ’84 @ 65k and made a nice crankcase milkshake. Rebuilt the engine and got many years and miles of good service out the the little runt.
Am I the only one who had forgotten that this came in a Squire version, complete with the plasti-planking? The original Escort (oh, how I remember that “world” badge) never did a thing for me, but this one with the woodie treatment may be the only one I have ever wanted.
The early Horizon/Omni offered a wood-sided version, but I think that was gone after 1980. I didn’t always think so, but as of now, I am proud to shout “Wood is Good!”
The Chevette had a “Woody” package for a few years too.
I don’t know if they ever made production, but VW displayed a woodgrained Rabbit at the 1979 Chicago Auto Show. I’ve never seen one myself. It doesn’t look half bad as a competitor for the ‘woody’ Omnirizon.
Ooo! That’s a new one, maybe it was a dealer add on?
We had a LHD US import Rabbit Diesel come thru work the other day… had the fake wood slapped on the sides…. truly awful… Why anyone would bring it all the way to New Zealand i couldn’t tell you!! haha
Thanks, I had forgotten about that one too. “Collect all three!”
Someone in my neighborhood bought an early ’81 two tone silver and black Escort wagon. With red interior and alloy wheels, like this one. I thought it was a cute little car. And a big improvement over the Pinto.
Every morning, on his way to work, he would stop at the stop sign in front of our home. That’s when I realized, how painfully underpowered the first Escorts were. Even with a manual transmission, it struggled up to speed. That engine sounded woefully inadequate. It looked good though.
I found this writeup very humorous, good read and nice work.
Hey, thanks!
Neat looking car, stout and compact. Reminds me of the first generation Ford Escape for some reason, with a little Fairmont thrown in.
All issues aside with handling and build quality I always thought that the first year model (from an aesthetic point) was a great looking little car, especially the GT model. The revisions that followed in the mid 80s and on just made the car worse looking. And then of course the quality etc got worse and worse.
I still can’t figure out why the wrapper on the tow bar. Going to be black paint on 3/16″ steel tubing; sun exposure is not going to hurt it….
Standard fitment on draggers , the tow bar is unsightly when un covered and the hardware rusts like made too .
-Nate
Wow, it had been a very long while then I didn’t saw a 1st-gen Escort wagon woodgrained. They all vanished here in Quebec.
Country Squirt?
Good one!
I have always had a fondness for the Squire wagons. One of my earliest automotive memories was my Dad’s ’63 Falcon Squire, Black over Red with optional bucket seats and the console. The ’63 was replaces with a ’65 standard Falcon wagon ib Blue with the White side stripe. In ’67 we switched to Chevy and Dad drove a succession of “Plain Jane” Bel-Air wagons through 1973. I always wished we had the nicer Estate of Squire versions.
In the Fall of ’81 I got my first new car, a Ford EXP 1.6 -5 speed. I looked at the Escort Wagon which would have been a bit more practical for a college student making trips from Pittsburgh to Tampa. The dealer didn’t have any wagons with the manual trans, so that was out.
My last wagon was a ’74 Country Squire in Gold Glow Metallic that I bought in St. Pete, Fl for my move back to Pittsburgh for Law School in 1985. The Urban Assault Vehicle as it was lovingly called was one of the best automotive purchases I ever made. For an investment of $600.00, I moved all my possessions and towed my ’84 Dodge Daytona Turbo Z back home. That was $300.00 less than renting a U-Haul. I kept the Ford for another 2 years and let my brother drive it for one more after that, before selling it for $800.00.
Now that’s a pretty interesting family history. You would have loved the wagon that I remember as The Country Squirrel. It was in beautiful shape when the town drunk bought it from the original owner, and it was only about six years old at the time. But, as is often the case, a car’s worst enemy is its second owner or third owner.
One of its owners did indeed care about it enough to protect it (or wanted to save money in insurance) by putting that 3rd brake light on it. Those 3rd brake light kits were big in the mid 1980’s and insurance companies offered a discount on premiums on folks that bought those kits
Once upon a time, I saw an aftermarket 3rd brake light on a ’61 or ’62 Rambler that was driven by the Rambler-driving stereotype, a little old lady. That really made me smile. The extra brake light was the only obvious deviation from stock.
That one little detail does say quite a bit about one of the previous owners of that Escort. I’m surprised I didn’t notice the extra brake light on the wagon.
Cracks me up how battered the front is. Too many missed attempts at hooking up to the camper eh?
At it’s age, I wonder how many times the timing belt has been changed.
I really liked the looks of these first Escorts, especially the wagons. Took one for a spin, a couple times, a dealer demo with a few hundred miles on it. Weak shocks, I’d watch the front bob up and down two or three times after driving over the crown of a road at an intersection. Engine seemed smooth, but too weak, or hobbled with too tall gears. Pedal layout was terrible. Adjust the seat to reach the brake and I had to stretch to reach the gas, and pull my leg way up to get on the clutch. Worst thing was the shifter. There was a dead end next to third gear. It felt like it was soldily in gear. Let the clutch out and hear the zzziiitt of things not meshing. Pass.
That same year, I was sitting in my apartment, heard a car accelerating in the parking lot, then zzziiitt! I thought “sounds like an Escort”. Looked out the window, just as an Escort went by. yup
In the late 80’s my grandfather was in one of his car flipping moods and bought two 1st gen Escorts, one wagon and one 2 door. My mom was without a car and he decided to help her out and gave her the choice between the two. She chose the 2-door because it was a manual gearbox vs the wagon had an automatic because in her words “Who wants a small car with an automatic?”
It was an ’84, silver with whorehouse red interior and a 4-speed manual. It served us well until she sold it in the mid 90’s. I remember her letting me shift the gears for her which I thought was very cool when I was a kid.
I was about 10 when it was sold and I was sad to see it go.
At one time the Ford Escort outsold all other cars on a global basis. Back in ’88 I was helping one of my nieces shopping for a car. We looked at 4 or 5 cars and ended up buying an Escort, blue with a dent in the right front fender.
She had this car for several years. Typical Ford: inexpensive basic transportation. I think that deserves respect because it fills a need rather than a want.
These were common “Guess the Teenager Can Drive That” cars in the ’80s. Even among other small cars, they were really cramped inside. My parents’ trusty (and never rusty, even after I smashed its shnoz on a tree) Horizon felt much wider and roomier.
Did being a “World Car” dictate a narrower profile for the Escort?
I agree. When I first drove an Escort (Lynx, actually) in 1981, I was well-familiar with my mother’s 80 Horizon. The L body seemed wider, more substantial, and certainly more “American.” Ford seemed to be chasing a very European vibe in its new stuff of that era that this midwestern kid found a little offputting. I suppose that if the cars had come with real European handling and performance, it might have worked, but they didn’t really. They just seemed unnecessarily Calvinistic.
“They just seemed unnecessarily Calvinistic.”
Hee hee. There used to be FoMoCo dealer option packages called “Bostonian,” which added cabriolet roofs and other doodads. Now I’m thinking a true Bostonian would be more of a Cotton Mather Signature Edition, with upright wooden driver’s pew and no heat. 🙂
I see more of the second (and third) generations of the Escort wagon than the first (1981-90) generation. The newer versions (1991-99) are based on a Mazda Protege chassis and hold up better than the early ones. My father had a 92 with a 5 speed stick. He thought it was one of the best cars he had. He did not like the dummy upshift light though.
Well, I’ve gone on and on about my ’81 Plymouth Champ. It was in the shop one time for a week, getting a new clutch and I barrowed my cousin’s 83 Escort, while on vacation. It was a Sherman tank compared to the buff book lauded Mitsu.
I did get an ’86 E-GT, and while not up to today’s quality, it was miled ahaed of current Mitsubishi’s. There is a reason Mits is fading into oblivion.