Cohort Outtake: Mark Sick

posted at the Cohort by William Rubano

I’m deeply impressed (and slightly nauseated) that Eric was able to present that 1975 Torino sedan in such an objective manner. If you were older than 7 or younger than 70 at the time, it’s hard to imagine being able to muster such a lack of emotion. I certainly, can’t; it most perfectly represents  everything that I loathed about Ford and the 70s, right down to its baby-shit color. There’s no way I could have mustered such an objective write-up; my encounter with one ended up very differently; it was the only way I could keep from writing an endless diatribe to that blobby, flabby, sloppy, inefficient, mal-proportioned, terrible-space-utilizing, rolling cave of a car.

Do I dislike these Torino sedans? Is there a car I dislike more? Umm; how about this one?

The Mark VI vies with that generation Torino sedan (and its LTD II successor) as some of the the worst proportioned cars ever made, but in a different way. While the Torino looks like someone stretched a Maverick sedan body onto an LTD frame, in this case it looks like someone photoshopped a Mark V onto a Pinto platform. The “Mark II” name should have really been reserved for it, since it follows the Mustang II down the same road: too big a body on too little of wheelbase and wheels, among other sins.

It’s a crime against good taste; a pretentious, rolling clown-mobile, a pastiche of styling gimmicks from another era that had already passed. It’s everything that was wrong once again at Ford, in the very worst way. No company has ridden such a worse stylistic roller coaster. This is perhaps its all-time low. Well, I can think of a few others yet, actually.