Going to Walgreens, and what do I see?
A Lincoln Mark LT – and it looks a lot like me!
But does it really? It isn’t red –
But it too has a really short bed.
The trailer hitch is the same,
as are the cab steps with which both came.
The Lincoln has more taillight so it can be detected,
But in truth it’s only light that will be reflected.
My Ford certainly has less chrome,
Less adornment that can call it home.
Big Red has a 4.6 and is a 4×4,
the Lincoln has a high-zoot 5.4.
Both are crew cabs with windows tinted,
Yet the Lincoln required more coin to be minted.
My ’07 Ford has many believers who are true blue,
For Lincoln, in ’07? Only 8,382.
Another answer for a question no one asked.
Exactly what my Monday morning was missing – a little truck poetry. 🙂
This was just so sad. Can you imagine the meeting where this came up?
Boss: “I think that we ought to dress up the F-150 and sell it as a Lincoln through Lincoln dealers.”
Underlings: “Yeah, we ought to make a lot of money with these.”
The guy who does the Dilbert comic strip will never run out of inspiration.
And of course the fact that they FORGOT the Blackwood in that meeting. (Remember the Blackwood! That should be cared in the Ford offices somewhere.)
I think in the years since the Blackwood was released, I’ve seen two, which may be about 1% of total Blackwood production.
No, I think they remembered it well. This is much more a standard F-150, while the Blackwood was pretty customized with no options available, not even 4×4.
Still, same failure in the end. Although a success for CC I would think. Practicality aside, I think the Blackwood was a pretty nice piece of work and in a lot of ways ahead of its time. These are the vehicles that make this site interesting.
I don’t get the Blackwood hate. It was a nice truck, and for what most people actually use their half ton trucks for these day, it was suited perfectly. No, it wasn’t a work truck made for hauling tools, building supplies, or bales of hay, and it wasn’t intended to be. I live in Texas and I can assure you that the Blackwood was all the truck most people ever needed. I’d love to have one because all I ever haul would fit neatly under the power tonneau, they look great, and they’re unique.
The certainly did make a fair amount of money on them the got to charge $7500 more than for a comparable F150 that only cost them a few more dollars to produce, plus they never offered rebates of the magnitude that they did on F150’s. No they didn’t sell in great numbers but on the ones they did it was likely the highest profit margin of any vehicle Ford sold both for Ford and dealers.
I’m thinking the only reason this thing was built was to have some sort of competitor to the the Cadillac Escalade EXT.
It’s actually not as bad as you may think, it cost about $2000 more than a comparably equipped F-150 Lariat/King Ranch and came with a year free maintenance, a longer warranty, higher quality leather, and a few other little perks. Not a bad deal as far as badge engineering goes.
Of course I am still of the opinion that anybody who pays that much for a half ton pickup probably doesn’t actually use it as a truck and is therefore a poser. There are some exceptions I’m sure, but I’ve never met one.
That Lincoln screams “queen family truckster” to me like no other has. If it had wood panels and was sport pea green it would be perfect to drive to Wally World amusement park.
I always thought it was really strange these didn’t sell better. Ford can sell all the $50k+ Platinum, King Ranch, Harley Davidson, and Lariat Limited F150’s it can build, but these Lincolns just sat on lots.
I assume it’s just the result of basically reverse badge snobbery, the Builder buying the Platinum crew cab F150 still feels like he fits in with his subcontractors driving XL’s, when in reality it looks exactly like the leather lined cowboy Cadillac it really is.
Also strange the Mark LT is still sold in Mexico. I guess if you’re a rancher (or Narco…) in Mexico and you have the money for a fancy truck, there’s no shame, and no need to hide behind a blue oval…
Interesting thought. Truck buyers do tend to be a bit more conservative and don’t necessarily want that kind of flash. The Platinum is pretty flashy though. Literally.
It could be that they are just ugly. To my eyes, it looks odd compared to an F-150. Cadillac had a modest success with the Escalade EXT, but being SUV-based it had the advantage of more car-like ride and handling than the pickup-based LT.
It is not like the Escalade wasn’t based on the GM pickup including the rear suspension unlike the Expedition/Navigator that had a unique IRS to improve it’s ride.
The Escalade EXT is based on the Avalanche, which in turn is based on the Suburban. The rear suspension has coils rather than leaf springs, and the body is a single piece rather than a separate box, which when combined with the structural sail panels gives it a tighter chassis. This gives it a more car like ride and better handling than the pickups. It’s not IRS, but it’s significantly and noticeably different than their pickups.
As a bonus they have the midgate which is pretty handy and increases versatility. The downside is the box is cramped due to not having the space around the wheel wells and those sail panels. It makes a big difference when loading and unloading stuff.
Personally, I thought I wanted an Avalanche for that midgate, but I’m glad I went with a pickup because the extra space in the box turned out to be more useful for me.
I’d say it’s the negative pimpmobile image of a LINCOLN like that. Not so much that the owner wants to pretend he’s a truck-driver, or contractor; but that he doesn’t want to be identified as nuevo riche or cretinus pimpus. A well-equipped Ford gives the same experience, better status and higher resale.
That said…if I were buying a truck, I’d want a TRUCK. Solid, sure. Comfy, if possible…in another era I’d be buying Recaro seats for it. But, dammit, a TRUCK. Strong like dirt. Painted metal inside Gauges that guage, not reek of plasticizers.. Capche, amigo?
Sadly, those seem in short supply.
I think you made a much wiser investment in choosing the F-150 although your parking skills need work! 🙂
Everyone has their challenges in life…mine is parking my pickup.
Mark my words, these (the Mark LT and the Blackwood) will be THE Ford collectibles of the future. People will be looking at these in 30 years like they look at woodies today. Snap one up.
By the way, the Escalade wasn’t a modest success for Cadillac, it was a HUGE success.
The pimp award goes first to the Escalade, then the Navigator, while the Mark LT got lost in wealthy metrosexualness.
When I said modest I was talking specifically about the Avalanche-based Escalade EXT, but after looking up the numbers I may have to retract that. According to Wikipedia they only sold 6500 in the US over the past three years. Max was only about 13,500 in 2002. With those numbers I’m surprised they haven’t officially canceled it yet like they have the Avalanche.
I can easily see the Blackwood being a collector’s item. The LT, I’m not so sure.
Not to be crabby, but I fundamentally detest these things, all slathered up with BLING and sold to “real housewives of someplace”…The confusing marketing of say…a Harley Davidson edition….” say, dude, nice Bike!..No, I mean truck, named after a bike! ” I just dont get it, especially with the WWE belt buckle badges…I guess I prefer a truck to be just that…Just honest, like my ’90 Sierra 3/4 ton.. On the other hand, it would be fun to drop a couple yards of gravel into it!
Excellent prose, Jay. Helped take my mind off this storm, if only for a bit.
Hang in there man. The Weather Channel has some neat streaming videos on their page…
Thanks Jason. I needed a good laugh!
I love iambic pentameter.
I alway thought the inner part of the Mark LT taillights looked like “stick on” red reflectors – they didn’t spend the money on real taillights. Cheap.
One of the car mags said the Blackwood was only good for picking up people at the Las Vegas airport and taking them to the country club for golfing.
No surprise that Lincoln has one foot in the grave if this is what they come up with
Seems less “prince & pauper” than, “This is my brother Darrell, and my other brother Darrell.”
Its funny, if you squint at these, you can see a high-riding car with formal roof, vertical C-pillar and a large boot. That’s what crew cabs are sold for. People want bigger and higher cars, and manufacturers are starting to build them in bulk, only calling them CUVs.
I’ll admit I’m not the best commenter on pickups, because I grew up in a time (the 60s) and a place (South Jersey) where pickups were ratty old things farmers drove because they were useful. I don’t get the whole pickup as fashion statement thing. What’s the fashion statement here? You want to be a tomato or blueberry grower? Seriously?
Having said that, I recognize that, as a Ford employee, I benefited mightily through profit sharing and bonuses from the people who did want to have pickups as daily drivers (really good variable profits on those units).
But when Ford made the Blackwood and then the Mark LT I asked, “Can there really be a market for a 6-passenger, short-bed, Lincoln pickup? I doubt it.” Turns out my instincts regarding pickups were right for once.
I know Blackwoods are but some guy near me owns one. I see it so often I forget that they are rare. I have only seen one Mark LT over the last few years. I do see quite a few King Ranch and Platinum F-150s driving around. Never on work sites though.
You won’t see too many medium duty 4×4 dually trucks with 8′ pickup beds on them at too many job sites either! Most of those tow no more than a chrome-plated, oversized dog scrotum hanging from the hitch receiver to make up for what the driver lacks (kinda like the loud-pipe crowd). The only way a truck sporting a dog scrotum looks right is with one back wheel jacked up, a broken driveshaft, and fluid leaking out of the transmission!
Spotted in the fast lane on the Santa Monica Freeway this afternoon – a Lincoln Mark LT. With attached tool boxes and a step ladder in the bed: a working truck! I was so surprised I had to chase it to get a picture. And then to find this thread to post. Not sure when I last saw one of these Lincolns.