(submitted by Jack H.)
Smooth paint to rusted
Engine bay dusty and cracked
Days, months, years of neglect
Torn seats, chipped leather, tires deflated
Flat, bald, nail in the middle
Empty tank, dry dipstick
Not sure of the make or model
Cup holder sticky, smudged fingers
Spotty glass, curb rash on every tire
20,000 pass due, little orange light
Oil change reminder, line for miles
Maybe 30 minutes, maybe an hour
You’ll wait, group showers
Car wash reminder, side door dink
Fender bender, expired plates, air filter
A nest for fluff, acorns, walnuts, dead rats
Just smack it out, change it later
Full synthetic? way too expensive!
Cheapest stuff you got, you’ll regret it later
Runs hot, burns bad
Washer fluid isn’t supposed to go in there?
Got it for a steal, two test drives
Negotiation, bent him over a barrel
Five hundred bucks a month, zero down!
Financing, cost sixty, make thirty
Drive it with all disregard
Junkyard, dealer, finger pressed on the
Shiny, new, latest model
Oil change reminder still got some miles
Drive, drive, drive
A little orange, little yellow light
Once a shiny, new, latest model
I like it!
The theme fits in with the answer to my question “What are JRITS” from yesterday’s discussion about changing CV boots on Jim Klein’s Subaru.
Thanks ell ess for the answer. (Just Rolled Into The Shop)
Follow-up question… what on earths is that filter in the lead in picture? It sure looks like the owner got their money’s worth! 😉
It looks like a cartridge type oil filter caked in sludge.
Once a shiny, new, latest model.
This sounds a lot like the chapter in ‘The Grapes of Wrath’ when the Joads are buying a car to make their journey west to California, and it’s written from the perspective of the shady auto dealer.
There was a book in the Fairleigh Dickinson University library called “Junkyard Poetry”, published in the early ’60s. I forget the author’s name. It had poems like this, together with black & white car junkyard photos. Great book–wish I could find it again. Internet searches turn up nothing. Does anyone know anything about it?
I like it. But this must not be about a minivan because there is nothing about french fries or teddy grahams in the carpets.
I feel less ashamed about driving any of my fleet to Jiffy Lube now.
On point is this video of a totally sludge filled Mercedes diesel
If it’s anything like it was when I worked there, I’d avoid it like plague. I wouldn’t take a car I hated to Jiffy lube.
And I was suffering anxiety because my car was 5 weeks overdue for a service, I feel much better now, Thanks.
You young pups never saw one like this in the old days of paraffin based motor oils ~ they’d cake up and after a while _DRY OUT leaving flakes of semi solid tar .
I remember more than a few that I couldn’t add any oil as the rocker boxes were packed full of this crud .
The final drive oil is common from water getting in .
No one ever does oil changes anymore and why should they ? run it like a rented mule for four years then have it detailed and trade it in….
I remember plenty of VW owners who’d run the brakes metal to metal and cut the drums in half .
I had one female customer who only brought her VW in when the oil light began to flicker, I showed her in the owner’s booklet where they said this is bad, she said “I _KNOW_ you’re just trying to cheat me” .
I had an old lady customer who *knew* that I put dog food in her airbox just to trick her. Not sure what my purpose was with the trick, I didn’t even try to sell her an air filter.
*Exactly* John ~ those who are dishonest in their hearts automatically assume everyone else is like them .
A sad way to live .
Sounds like the old lady has a hefty rodent problem. I recently changed the air filter on my wife’s 2018 Ford Taurus. The air box was packed with grass and oak leaves and 75% of the air filter was chewed up. I cleaned it out and put in a new filter. What to do now? It ran good then. It runs good now. Keep calm and carry on.