In a past article, I noted that it was amazing to me that Chrysler was using great names from the past to market their products. The 8-speed automatic gearbox that backs their cars isn’t simply a ZF 8HP45. It’s a TorqueFlite. It’s not simply a Challenger R/T+. It’s a Challenger Scat Pack, and the world is a brighter and happier place for that. That got me into thinking, what other names from the past would be cool to see today?
It’s really a shame that those futuristic sounding names just went off the wayside as time moved forwards. That’s not to say that those Jetson-esque sounding names completely disappeared from the automotive world. Mercedes-Benz has dispensed with the “ABC” acronym for their latest generation of active suspension control and have given it the considerably more grandiose name “Magic Body Control”. Call me an old romantic, but I can see an old American car that had been fitted with the best suspension technology that the 1950’s could’ve given us fitted with “Magic Body Control”. Or even better, “Space Body Control”; suspension so advanced you’ll feel as though you’re traveling through the infinity of space.
Personally a name I’d really love to see again would be Turbo Hydra-matic. Like TorqueFlite, it takes a rather thankless component, one you tend to ignore until it starts slipping or it misses a gearshift, and somehow adds that much flair and passion in it. Of course, GM still uses Hydra-matic as their trademark automatic transmission name, but you wouldn’t know it from build-your-own configurators, which only refer to it as a “6-Speed automatic transmission.”. I mean, wouldn’t you like to say “Yeah, I bought this new Impala…with Turbo Hydra-matic!”? I would. You could even call the conventional automatics “Turbo Hydra-matics” and the CVT they’re now fitting to Sparks and such “Powerglide”. And before my more traditionalist readers organize themselves to throttle me, consider this: would a world with a new Powerglide be a worse one? You could even fit badges like these:
But what about you, what names would you like to see plucked from the great ones of history and brought back from the dead?